Mom's Memorial Slideshow

This is the slideshow we played at Mom's memorial service. It is a photo montage set to the song Babe by Styx. Babe was my stepfather's pet name for Mom. This was their song.

Mom's Final Story

One last time, Mom, Clara, has left us.

In all the years we knew her, Mom often talked about shedding all her possessions and hitting the road. Be it in a RV headed to Montana, or on a boat headed to the Keys, she was always in part a nomad. In her final years, she talked a lot about wanting to move to the Keys. She started collecting pirate paraphernalia, and other tropical sundries. The Keys seemed to hold a promise of the ultimate escape she had always longed for, free from responsibility, to anyone or anything. It was a place where her inner rebel could find sanctuary, along with all the other Conch Rebels, as those who seek asylum in the Southernmost part of the country call themselves. Indeed, she even had the moniker as her personal email address.

Sensing that we were racing the clock, we were all working towards making a trip to the Keys as a family. It was our hope that a window of opportunity between Mom's cancer treatments would open up, even briefly, for a road trip to the Conch Republic. Sadly, this would not happen.

At the end of her first round of chemotherapy, Mom's pain from her cancer intensified, so much so that she required hospitalization. While in the hospital, she developed other complications related to pain management, but her primary goal was to get her pain under control and to get out of the hospital. There was that trip to the Keys beckoning, after all. We managed to bring Mom home after a couple of weeks, but her pain got out of control again, and she ended up back in the hospital. We didn't know it at the time, but Mom was losing her battle with the disease, and we were losing her. Her cancer was highly aggressive; a final scan had shown that the cancer had spread dramatically, in spite of her treatment. As Mom's pain got worse, and her pain medication increased, her consciousness faded.

We brought Mom home under the auspices of hospice care on July 4th. She had her family at her side at all times, playing music she loved, reading to her, talking to her, or just holding her hand, loving her.

It was fortunate that she was home, as July 7th was her grandson Dewayne's birthday. We were able to have a small party, and for Mom to be there with us. It was a joyous event, despite the circumstances. But sadly, later that evening, Mom started showing signs that she may be nearing the end. Her hospice nurse, a wonderful woman named May, said she had a sense that Mom would pass before her shift ended the next morning.

Late in the evening, her husband Jerry, her children Brenda, Jake, Christina, and Amanda, and her grandchildren Dewayne and Chrystal all gathered around her. Joining hands together and with Mom, we took turns saying to Mom what we felt needed to be said before we could let her go. Afterwards, we all sat around her as we listened to and sang along to many of Mom's favorite songs into the wee hours of the morning.

Mom slipped away around 7 am on July 8, 2009.

Other than May, we had all fallen asleep not long before Mom left us. It's easy to believe that she was waiting for us to not be watching as she left. When we were children, Mom would sometimes have to leave because of her assignments the Air Force would send her on. We would tell her to wake us before she left so she could say goodbye, but she always slipped away while we were asleep. We would eventually try to beat her at this game and attempt to stay awake all night, but she always won, as she did this one last time.

It was an amazing privilege to be able - as a family - to spend that time with Mom in her final hours. It was an even greater gift to be able to have cared for her in her final days.

We held a memorial service for Mom at her childhood church, Lake Hill Baptist Church, the place where she was first married, and the same church where services for her mother were held. The turnout was wonderful, with approximately 150 people who came to pay respect in person, and countless others joining us in spirit, testament to the impact Clara had on people. The memorial was closed with each of those present symbolically releasing butterflies into the wind. This was followed by a joyous Celebration of Life at one of her favorite haunts, the Dubsdread Golf Course, just down the road from her home. Mom enjoyed dining on the patio, something we got to do with her just a couple months ago.

Mom, Clara, was an exceptional woman. She deserved an exceptional send off. Because she had longed to return to the Keys, we made it our mission to make sure she did. It was a mission not without difficulties, indeed there were many, but in the end, it was a great success. With the use of a family member's boat, Mom was taken to a quiet and calm location in the Gulf of Mexico, off of Key West. In a casual but beautiful ceremony, with Mom's favorite songs playing in the background, we prepared the water with flower petals. We collectively read a poem aloud, with her first husband and friend, Curtis, joining in on speakerphone. A final but brief poem was read before her ashes - enclosed in a biodegradable container - were released to the sea.

We sat and watched the currents slowly carry away the flower petals, and symbolically, Mom. After a short while, her grandson, Joey, wanted to swim with his Grammy one last time. We all followed him into the water, floating and swimming, singing along with Mom's songs, being with her wholly one last time.

We eventually left and went to explore an area elsewhere that Mom had liked, before heading back to shore. Using saved GPS coordinates, we returned to the spot where we had released Mom, and now the water was even more calm. We stopped for just one last swim, and noticed that the place had a completely different feel. It felt more lively, yet peaceful. We noticed much more sea life than before, including a very large stingray passing by, and a wayward butterfly fluttering by the boat. The symbolism was remarkable.

Clara is gone in body, but she remains with us in our hearts and our memories.

All of the family is extremely grateful for all of the love and support - emotional and material - that we have been given by those who love us, and those who loved Clara. That we could all be so fortunate to be connected with such great people is testament to that which Clara gave to the world.

We humbly thank you, with all of our hearts.

Farewell, Clara

My mother Clara is gone, and we miss her terribly. We can find at
least a bit of comfort knowing she is no longer suffering, and that
while her fight with cancer was somewhat brief, we can all be happy
for her escape. Mom has found the ultimate freedom, and has become
"one" with the Universe again. Her journey has ended.

Mom was always a nomad at heart, often ready for an adventure at the
drop of a hat, be it driving her Cadillac El Dorado from coast to
coast, or enlisting in the Air Force and moving to Turkey, not once
but twice. I have to say that it is funny how someone so adventurous
could be so afraid of lizards. While her journey sometimes took her
far away, she somehow always remained at the center of our lives.

She had a glowing, infectious smile that could light up a dark night,
or cheer up a sad soul. Her heart was almost too big to contain, and
she worked hard in the service of others. Her family meant everything
to her, and there was nothing she would not do for them. She was that
person you could call for help in the middle of the night, and could
count on to be there.

As time went on, Mom may have gotten older, but her spirit continued
to grow more youthful. You could sense that if she had the
opportunity, she would beeline for the Keys and hop on the first
passing pirate ship. The things she had once feared began to beckon
her. I was particularly stunned when - after many years of being
admonished by her for riding motorcycles - Mom asked me to take her
for a ride.

But now she is gone.

While we may not look forward to the coming bouts of pain and anguish,
and sadness in missing her, we can look forward to remembering Clara
in ways and times we don't always expect; like to feel her warmth in a
radiant sunset; to think of her bright smile on a dark night
brightened by moonlight; or to see her hair blowing in the wind the
next time we're driving with the top down.

Mom's body is gone, and with that her sweet, soft voice that used to
sing me to sleep; her long fingernails that would gently scratch my
back to soothe and relax me. But she will always be with me - with all
of us. All we have to do is to think of her and she will be there,
looking as beautiful as she ever did.

</mom>

Clara Nell Konrad, 4/10/48 - 7/8/09

Mom lost her fight with pancreatic cancer this morning. She passed away with her loving family at her side.

I have more to say about Mom, but am unable to just now. But I can at least say now that she was as beautiful inside as she was outside, and she touched the lives of nearly everyone she met. She will be deeply missed.

I will be boycotting NPR

The one journalism outfit I thought could be implicitly trusted FAILS epically.

http://feeds.salon.com/~r/salon/greenwald/~3/ZRd6hHBnPZc/index.html

Now I tremble with shame in the face of their bravery

We all should.

The Choir Grows

More folks are catching on as time goes by.

Policies that were wrong under George W. Bush are no less wrong because Barack Obama is in the White House. (my emphasis)

One of the most disappointing aspects of the early months of the Obama administration has been its unwillingness to end many of the mind-numbing abuses linked to the so-called war on terror and to establish a legal and moral framework designed to prevent those abuses from ever occurring again.

The list expands beyond just the GWoT, but the gist of the Op-Ed is that what's wrong is wrong, regardless of who the president is. But from my perspective, Obama keeping Bush policies in place makes him worse than Bush, because he has effectively lied to America and stabbed many of his most ardent supporters in the back.

At least when Bush was giving us the finger, we expected it.

 

Forcing private insurers on Americans

Regarding health care, the claims by private insurers that nearly 2/3rds of Americans would drop their private plans in favor of a public option is a de facto admission that private insurance is a failure, and the only way to keep most Americans using private insurance is to force that to be our only option.

That's pretty damned disgusting, as it is a glaring example of the insidious nature of private health insurers.

Down with the Duplicitous Di Fi

Some reasons why I think Senator Feinstein needs to go away, for good!

Scientology Exposed! A New Report

Scientology leader David Miscavige is the focus of this special report from the St. Petersburg Times. Former executives of the Church of Scientology, including two of the former top lieutenants to Miscavige, have come forward to describe a culture of intimidation and violence under David Miscavige. These former Scientology leaders served for years with Miscavige.

Read the Special Report from the St. Petersburg Times

Fight the Power!

Tiananmen Square. Kent State. Tehran U. When the people stand en masse against those in power, and risk their lives doing so, they forever change the world.

The pro-democracy protesters in Iran are changing the world right before our eyes. This will go down in history as something more important than Obama's election. Are you watching?

This is what fighting for democracy looks like

Iranians show the world how to respond to stolen elections. America has so much to learn!

JibJab strikes again!

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Stop the Slaughter of Taiji Dolphins!

For such an advanced culture, it is astonishing that some Japanese can be so barbaric and disgustingly cruel. The Cove, a new film that has been hailed as part Flipper, part The Bourne Identity, exposes a sickening and cruel - and illegal business of Japanese fisherman slaughtering wild dolphins in a secret cove in Taiji.

In Japan, fishermen round up and slaughter hundreds and even thousands of dolphins and other small whales each year.

In the small fishing village of Taiji, entire schools of dolphins are driven into a hidden cove after a prolonged chase. Once trapped inside the cove, the fishermen kill the dolphins, slashing their throats with knives or stabbing them with spears. The water turns red with their blood, and the air fills with their screams.

This brutal massacre — the largest scale dolphin kill in the world — goes on for six months of every year. Even more scandalous, members of the international dolphin display industry take advantage of the dolphin slaughter to obtain some few, show-quality dolphins for use in captive dolphin shows and dolphin swim programs.

Learn more about this shame on Japan, and watch the trailer for the compelling movie here. Then take action to stop this barbarism!

State Department asks Twitter to postpone maintenance

Wow. This is pretty huge!

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The U.S. State Department said on Tuesday it had contacted the social networking service Twitter to urge it to delay a planned upgrade that would have cut daytime service to Iranians who are disputing their election.

Live_tweeting the revolution

It's getting violent and deadly in Iran, but this revolution looks very real.

http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_dish/2009/06/livetweeting-the-revolution.html#more

In Tehran

A student protester in Tehran helps an Iranian riot cop who was beaten by other protesters.

Meanwhile, other riot cops, conservative Islamic militias, and Arab thugs are mercilessly beating and killing protesters all over Iran.

Iranian students protesters beaten

some to death.

Animal Farm Friday (on Moday) - Oh Hi!

I can haz catnip?

A celebration of altered states (now legalize it!).

Why is the MSM so quiet on Iran?

Apart from Obama's victory, this is the biggest story in the world right now, but the western media is strangely quiet on this.

Seriously, even some ayatollahs and election monitors are calling Ahmadinejad's win a fraud.

The people of Iran need to know they have our support and compassion
in their resistance against the mullahs and theocracy.

Andrew Sullivan is all over this, and surprisingly so is Hugh Hewitt from Fox.