Monday, September 15, 2008

Say the opposite, say the opposite

Up is really down
Left is really right
Night is really day
Dark is really light
Really, nearly right

There is simply no other way to look at Conservative/Republican politics anymore than as exactly "through the looking glass." For a party and group to have as a solid core of their foundation a bias against drugs, I am really wondering what the hell it is that they have either been smoking, snorting, injecting, or swallowing, 'cuz man, that must be some good shit!

We saw this all along with George W. Bush and his administration. The biggest examples are what we saw from Iraq, to Katrina, to the economy.

When King W stood on the deck of that carrier in front of the banner declaring "Mission Accomplished", that must have been the first of the biggest clues that the "mission" (not that he had any real mission in place) was barely even begun. When Li'l Bush said "heckuva job, Brownie!" we should have known (though we did suspect) he meant, "Wow, Brownie. You really fucked this up, but there's no way I'll admit that, since I'm the jackass that gave you this job." When Georgie proclaimed back in his State of the Union that "the fundamentals of our economy are strong," that was the wake-up call to everyone listening that we were indeed in deep shit.

Fast forward a few years, and now we have a presidential candidate formerly known as John "The Maverick" McCain echoing the very same words as Georgie back when, saying "the fundamentals of our economy is strong," which we can only take at face value to mean that we are more fucked now than ever.

But take a couple more steps back for some more "Up is Down" examples. "The Presidential Candidate Formerly Known as John McCain" heretofore referred to as McSame (or McStain, McLiar, McPOW, McFake, McCan't, McMalleable, Mc?), has been promising to bring "Change" to Washington, never mind the fact that he has been in Washington 26 years and the only thing he has changed since then was his once centrist position to that of a full-fledged right-wingnut. He changed wives through an adulterous affair when he started fucking Cindy behind the back of his wheelchair-bound wife, but that was before he became Somebody.

McStain's first notable achievement in office as a Congressman was to sell himself out to some low-rent financialist thugs, embroiling himself into a scandal with this group known as The Keating Five. While he used some of his endless supply of POW clout to keep his ass out of jail - and from getting any sort of real admonition, the bottom line is that the first opportunity McStain had to do something right, he chose to do something wrong. Well, I guess that was the second chance he had to do the right thing. The first being to have not ditched his first handicapped wife for the totally rich prom queen.

During the time between when he sold out to the S&L thugs and the 2000 presidential campaign, Mc? exerted most of his efforts trying to re-brand himself by creating an image of himself as a Maverick willing to challenge his own party. It's the only thing a naturally corrupt politician can do, and that is also what makes him a perfect Republican. By pretending to be a Maverick, always trying to do the right thing, when in fact he is just another power-hungry, amoral, corrupt politician for sale to the highest bidder, he is fitting squarely into the "Up is Down" mold that is the purest definition of the Conservative/Republican idea. He exclaims "I am a Maverick telling you that I am fighting against everything I am actually guilty of doing!"

Up is Down.

Now, here, today, we have as Mc?'s chief economics adviser none other than the very person scum sucking sleazebag most intellectually sound people believing was the one person most responsible for our current economic crises - if there can be only one - because of his spearheading the deregulation of financial markets as head of the U.S. Senate Committee on Banking, Housing, and Urban Affairs, and the same fucker that made the Enron scam possible. As if that's not enough, another one of Mc?'s top economics advisers is none other that a tool that goes by the name John Thain, the CEO of Merrill Lynch, once a powerhouse in the financial sector but had recently sold itself for chump change to Bank of America. With all that foundation, McFuck-You-America says he's going to bring about change to Wall Street.

Left is Right.

But wait. There's more. One of the latest lines of attack from McWarHero is that he will take on the lobbyists that control Washington. He says this as the very individuals that run his campaign are some of the biggest lobbyists in the business. Charlie Black (lobbied for nearly everything evil), Rick Davis (lobbied for the nation of Georgia), former Senator Phil Gramm (lobbied for UBS), and has other lobbyists working for his campaign that were super cozy with convicted former lobbyist Jack Abramoff. So with that, McLiar says he's "going to take on the Washington lobbyists!" I guess there can be some truth to that if by "taking on" he means "hiring".

Mc? has been borrowing a line from King George, about the fundamentals of the economy being strong. He's used this one a lot, and used it again today, on the same day that Wall Street plummeted harder than it had since 9/11. After being called out on it, Mc? tried to claim that the "fundamentals" he was referring to were actual workers. But probably not the same workers whose salaries he's worked feverishly to keep down, and whose unions he's been complicit with busting, the same workers who he pretends to stand for during election cycles, but votes against at every opportunity placed before him (that is, when he actually does his job and votes).

Night is Day.

Mc? also supported King George in firing up the Iraq War, then pretended he was against the president because he had a different kind of war on, only to later take credit for championing the "Surge" after he had barely supported it out of fear it would fail, and only came out as its champion when it looked like it was sort of working.

Dark is Light.

Seriously, when everything you do is exactly the opposite of what you say you stand for, then all we can do is take you at [the opposite of] your word. So when Conservatives/Republicans rail against drugs, we can only accept as fact that they are actually in-taking the best fucking drugs anyone can imagine.


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